


i dont go out, much like i used to

by mehnema (swedish_furniture), swedish_furniture



Series: They're In The Water [4]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Gabriel is Mentioned but Not Present, Hurt No Comfort, M/M, Rape/Non-con Elements
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-08
Updated: 2021-03-08
Packaged: 2021-03-14 05:41:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,323
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29912253
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/swedish_furniture/pseuds/mehnema, https://archiveofourown.org/users/swedish_furniture/pseuds/swedish_furniture
Summary: Crowley is evil, not suicidal, and he's not about to get into bed with a Leviathan just because he hasn't gotten his rocks off since Gabriel went and got himself killed."Would it help if I looked like someone different?"(Crowley should maybe look into grief counseling but this is quicker and easier.  That's probably not a comment on anything else.)
Relationships: Crowley/Gabriel (Supernatural), Crowley/Leviathans (Supernatural)
Series: They're In The Water [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/71898
Comments: 1
Kudos: 4





	i dont go out, much like i used to

**Author's Note:**

> heads up going in: this is tagged RAPE/NONCON. It is not entirely accurate in my opinion, but Crowley decides to sleep with someone who has taken the form of someone he loves with the express intention of this reaction from him, which feels very. manipulative and may squick some people out. I totally understand if you choose not to read this. 
> 
> on a funner authors note: this was written in the early 2010s when i was still watching spn and Suffering for it, and i have done no editing to it whatsoever. the title is from Sleeping With A Friend by Neon Trees.

It’d been a necessary, calculated risk on Crowley’s part, talking to Dick Roman, but the path to power is paved with risks, and Crowley hadn’t become the King of Hell by sitting pretty on the sidelines and waving his demonic pom-poms. 

He’d expected them to keep an eye on him, now that he’d brought himself to their attention. For all of Dick’s talk of being bigger and better than Crowley, Crowley’s still a player in this game, and the Leviathans would be stupid to not keep track of all the pieces in play. 

That doesn’t stop him from being insulted when he sees they’ve only set  _ one _ pair of eyes on him. 

(The Leviathan’s in the body of a teenage boy- “Call me Alec.” it says, with a disarming grin, holding out a hand to shake. Crowley doesn’t take it- he’s not  _ stupid _ .)

It’s a stupid, little game, just a sideshow to what’s really going on- but Alec pretends to be harmless, and Crowley sends a rather unfortunate underling with a fruit basket, saying ‘Welcome to the neighborhood’. 

(Alec’s on his doorstep the next day, to give him back the basket- untouched, except that all the strawberries are missing. There’s a splatter of something that might be fruit juice- or blood- on the handle. “Thanks for the snack, man.” Alec says. The underling never comes back.)

The Leviathan shows up in his kitchen one morning, sitting on the counter, looking innocent, human, normal, when it’s anything but. Crowley doesn’t ask how it got in, because the Leviathans are strong enough to rip though his wards like they’re tissue paper, but it’s nice to have a sense of security, no matter how false it is.

“How’re you doing, Crowles?” it asks, legs swinging in the air. “Being a busy little demon? What kind of interesting plots are you scheming? You should tell me about them. Over dinner.”

(There’s no appropriate response to that, and Alec saunters out of the room, winking at Crowley.)

At first, Crowley assumes it’s a ploy to make him lower his guard, and he’s wary- right up until the Leviathan wanders into his dining room, and announces- “I brought dessert.”

(It’d brought  _ apple pie _ , of all things. “Say what you will about Dean Winchester.” it tells him. “But the man has great taste in food.” There’s a silent ‘ _ of the nonhuman variety _ ’ somewhere in that statement, but Crowley chooses to ignore it.)

Dinner’s quiet for as long as Alec’s stuffing it’s face- when his mouth  _ isn’t _ full, it’s keeping up a mocking commentary of all the major players in the current apocalypse.

(Crowley gains a new appreciation for the Leviathan after it makes fun of Sam Winchester’s hair.)

“Y’know,” it says idly. “I  _ volunteered _ for demon-watch.”

Crowley raises an eyebrow. “Why in Hell would you do something like  _ that _ ?”

Alec grins at him. “Dick  _ hates _ you.”

(It doesn’t answer the question, but Crowley’s gotten to know the Leviathan well enough that it actually kind of  _ does _ .)

There’s a moment of almost-companionable silence, and it’s almost  _ nice _ , and that’s just  _ not allowed _ , and it’s not a surprise when Alec speaks up.

“We should fuck.”

Crowley freezes, forkful of pie halfway to his mouth, and thinks about checking his meatsuit’s hearing, because there’s just  _ no way _ -

“I’m serious. We should fuck.”

No, he’d heard it right the first time, but it doesn’t make any more sense the second time hearing it.

“There’s no reason we should.” he says.

“There’s no reason we  _ shouldn’t _ .” the Leviathan shoots back. “Come on,  _ I’m _ in a hormonal teenage boy,  _ you’re _ hot, let’s get horizontal and  _ do _ something about it. The sexual tension is making me want to  _ eat _ someone.”

(Crowley actually kind of agrees- minus the ‘eating people’ bit- but he’s evil, not suicidal, and he’s not just going to get into bed with a  _ Leviathan _ , just because he hasn’t gotten his rocks off since Gabriel went and got himself killed.)

“Would it help if I looked like someone different?” Alec offers. “The Winchesters. Their pet angel. Bobby Singer, if trucker hats and stubble is your thing.”

“No, no, no, and  _ bloody _ no.” Crowley snaps, thinking of golden eyes and blonde hair and candy utilized in devilishly complicated sexual maneuvers. “Get out of my house.”

Alec shrugs and brushes by him, and Crowley assumes that they’re done. 

Crowley’s not expecting anyone, when he walks into his house. No one visits him unannounced anymore, not since Gabriel died, and he’s gotten used to his villa being dark and quiet when he walks in.

He’s certainly not expecting Gabriel, sitting on the end of his bed, looking at a picture of them he doesn’t remember keeping.

(It’s one of the rare pictures where Gabe isn’t moving, and they’re both in it- Gabriel had swung an arm over Crowley’s shoulder and pulled him close, taking the picture above them with his other hand, and Crowley had complained that he felt like a bloody teenage girl, but Gabe’s smiling in the picture, a big, shit-eating grin, and Crowley’s not exactly glaring.)

Except this thing is  _ obviously _ not Gabriel, because Gabriel’s  _ dead _ , and Gabriel’s not Castiel, he doesn’t have a perpetual Get-Out-of-Death-Free card, and Crowley very much suspects that God, like Elvis, is not in the building anymore.

“You’re not Gabriel.” he informs the thing that looks so very  _ much _ like Gabriel.

Not-Gabriel smirks at him, a familiar expression. “Of course I’m not, cupcake.” he says, and then, gets up to look at himself in a conveniently placed mirror. “Huh. Thought I’d be taller.”

(Crowley can’t help himself- it’s too much like the banter they used to have- “You always  _ were _ a short little bastard.”)

But this isn’t Gabriel, and it’d make him sick, if he had morals to get sick about. It’s a Leviathan, using Gabriel’s body for it’s own purposes, it’s own amusement.

(He’s a demon, he has precious  _ few _ morals, but it almost makes him sick anyway.)

But for all that it’s  _ not _ Gabriel, for all that it’s a Leviathan- it  _ is _ Gabriel, in the wicked gleam of his eyes, in the way he’s doing obscene things to the lollipop in his mouth.

The Leviathan’s watching him, and it pulls the lollipop out of it’s mouth with a wet ‘ _ pop _ ’.

(It’s cherry, apparently, and it’s stained Gabriel’s lips an unholy shade of red.)

“Well, guess trucker hats and stubble really  _ weren’t  _ your thing.” it comments, and there’s a flare of movement behind it, and now it’s got Gabriel’s wings out.

(Crowley licks his lips, completely conscious of the noises Gabriel had made the last time he’d brought his wings out to play during sex.)

The Leviathan’s walking toward him now, a hand trailing along the waistband of it’s pants, wings unfurling behind it, and  _ it has him _ .

“So, what d’you say to helping me break in the new body, Crowles?”

(It’s not the right nickname- Gabriel’s nicknames had always been ‘cupcake’ or ‘sweetcheeks’ or something that sounded more edible than endearing. But it doesn’t matter because the Leviathan is talking with Gabriel’s mouth, and Crowley hadn’t realized how much he’d missed this ass until right now.)

The Leviathan- _ Gabriel _ \- is close enough to touch him now, and it does- yanks him into a kiss that’ll probably bruise.

That’s not how Gabriel used to kiss- kissing Gabriel was soft and slow and lazy, and it tasted like sugar and artificial coloring. Kissing Gabriel  _ now _ is harsh and demanding, and Crowley can taste-smell the sharp, salty tang of blood.

The difference then-Gabriel and now-Gabriel doesn’t stop Crowley from threading his hands through golden wings, and  _ pulling _ , until Gabriel lets out a broken, strangled whimper-moan.

(Crowley can feel the Leviathan smirking against his mouth. “Huh, that was a  _ trip _ .” it murmurs. “Do it  _ again _ .”)

Crowley complies because he never could deny Gabriel much- and even if it’s not Gabriel, it  _ looks _ like him, and that about all that matters right now.

**Author's Note:**

> leave me a comment so we may be joined together forever in having read this fic- i wrote it so long ago that the memory of it has left me, like animals fleeing preemptively from a natural disaster, and reading it again, i was a horrified bystander, wiped clean of accountability. thank you very much to Fan, who i forced to read this to figure out what was a good fic summary, and who keeps saying i am funny, which i suspect is gross hyperbole on their part 
> 
> stay as safe as is possible in these times, wear a mask, get your vaccine when it is available to you. i love you all


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